Meet your neighbor: Jessica Thomason

Published 8:00 am Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Jessica Thomason firmly believes that her past led her to her future.

While that might be a commonly held belief, she has more reason than many to feel that way.

“Every single morning, I make a gratitude list,” the Springville resident said.  “What I’m most grateful for is God, that I have him to lean on and depend on.  When I look back at how desperate and sad and lonely my life was, I’m so grateful that I can wake up now and not be hung over, that I can sit in the floor and pray, that I can drive to work without worrying about how to get another pill so I can make it through the day.”

In two weeks, Thomason will celebrate five years of sobriety, having abandoned a lifestyle of alcohol and drug addiction that began when she was a teenager.

“I had my first drink when I was 13, and it was in 2009 when I finally went to treatment.  I used to feel guilt and shame about the things I did in those years between, but I don’t any more.  I think it’s a part of my life I had to experience to get me where I am today.  I always ask God in my prayers not to let me forget where I came from, because if I forget, the next drink or drug is too close.  I never want to forget how it was.”

Now married to country singer Trey Lewis, who has also recovered from years of drug addiction, Thomason explained what led her to seek help for her problem, how she uses her experiences to help others, and what it’s like being married to a musician.

Getting help:  “I think what prompted me to get help with my addiction was I had lost everything. I was at my bottom. I wasn’t living in reality, and it makes me sick to think of how I was living my life each day. I had a ton of legal issues that I wouldn’t face, and I was in a constant state of paranoia. I had no relationships with anyone. Everything I ever had that meant anything to me was gone. I woke every morning to drink and pass out again. I often prayed for God to take my life. I was eventually stealing to support my habit.  

“After some more legal issues surfaced because of my theft, my mother asked me to get help. I agreed. I went into treatment with no intention of getting or staying sober, but a seed was planted while I was there. I was asked to go to a sober living facility for women after my time with treatment was over. It was there my life was truly changed forever. That is where I got willing. I did everything they told me to do. It was the best experience of my life, and it taught me so much about myself. I am who I am today because of that place.”

Why sharing her experiences to help others is important to her:  “Part of my recovery depends on me working with others.  It will insure me immunity from that next drink. I want to give to someone else what was so freely given to me.  If I can share my experience with one person and they can relate even a little and gain hope from that, I know that maybe I’ve helped someone.  To watch people who once seemed hopeless start their recover is an experience that God has given me the opportunity to be a part of. I will forever be thankful for that.”

The best advice she ever received:  “Don’t stop.  I was having a difficult time letting go of some resentment and fears. I felt like I had done the work to move past these things but just couldn’t push past it. I was having coffee with a friend, and I was telling her my difficulties. She shared her experience with me, and I listened. I really listened. I started a different course of action. I would call her and tell her the relief I was getting from doing the work and she would say ‘Good.  Don’t stop.’ Even when it would get tough trying to push forward through all the things that had held me down for so long, I could hear her saying ‘Don’t stop’ in my head.  I apply that to just about everything now.”

How she met her husband:  “We had been attending some of the same events, and the first time I met him was about a year before we decided to be friends.  I did not like him and did not want to be his friend.  Obviously, that changed.”

On being married to a musician:  “You have to be thick-skinned.  There are a lot of ups and downs, and it definitely places a strain on our marriage sometimes.  When he has gigs all week, we don’t see each other much, and I miss him a lot.  But the joy he gets out of what he does is a bright spot.  Trey has been able to tell his story, share hope and strength, and touch a lot of people through his music.  I can’t deny him the opportunity to do that.”

How Lewis feels about his wife:  “I appreciate her a ton. I don’t know how she does it, honestly.  I respect her so much.  I’m truly proud of her for sticking with me. Her support means the world to me. I don’t know if I would have kept on at times without her support.”

Does he sing a lot around the house?  “Every now and then, I’ll hear him in the shower warming up,” Thomason said.  “It’s awful.  When he’s rehearsing with his guitar, I hear it so much and have gotten so used to it, it’s just background noise.  But if I ever hear him working on a song he’s never played before, I’ll stop and listen.”

Her vocal talents:  “I sing really good in the shower, and I’m phenomenal in the car.  When Trey’s last album came out, I harmonized with him in the car.  He just wouldn’t realize it.”

Her favorite music:  “Besides Trey Lewis?  While streaming in my car this morning, I heard Jason Isbell, Lorde, The Allman Brothers, The Franklin Electric, and even Miley Cyrus.  So I don’t really have a favorite. When I listen to music, I hear instruments. I listen for horns, guitars, drums, keyboards, and harmonies.  Granted, I do love lyrics and anything that can take me to a time or a place that I can remember. I love anything that I can relate to that gives me that deep-down-in-my-soul-gut-grabbing feeling that I’ve been there, that I know what he or she is singing about. Then there is that song that makes you roll your windows down and you grab that volume and crank it up and play it real loud.  I love all music. I think I owe thanks to Trey for that.”

The celebrity with whom she’d most like to have a conversation:  “Miranda Lambert.  She is married to Blake Shelton. So here’s the deal:  If I can sit and talk to her about her life and her success, then maybe Trey and Blake can talk music. It’s a win-win situation.” 

How she describes herself:  “Independent.  Strong-willed.  Determined.  Today I’m strong.  Grateful.  And happy.”

How important is determination?  “Very.  The path I was on, I needed a better life for myself, and I had to be determined to make it happen.  I wanted to be happy.  I wanted to have a husband and a family.  I have that today.  I wanted friends I consider family.  I wanted a relationship with my mother.  I wanted a relationship with my son.  I was determined to have those things, and I have them today.”

Her son:  Zane, an eighth grade student at Hokes Bluff.  “At age five, he was diagnosed with autism.  Like Trey, he’s taught me to be selfless, patient, kind, and loving.  To me, he’s the mirror image of perfect.”

Her favorite leisure activities:  “I have a very demanding schedule, so leisure time is relax time.  Any time I have time with Trey to relax, I’m grateful for it. Also, any time with friends and family I’m always thankful for. Without them, I’d don’t know where I’d be, so time with them is always precious.”

Something an acquaintance might be surprised to know about her:  “I have a lot of tattoos.”

Jessica Thomason style:  “Well, I work at St. Vincent’s, so I don’t have many options there because I’m in scrubs all day.  I probably have 30 different scrubs tops.  Outside of work, I like to look nice, and I try to keep up with what’s in style.  And I love big hair – big, pageant hair.”

Her favorite indulgence:  “A pedicure.  It’s just me, a trashy magazine, a massage chair, and silence.” 

If stranded on the hypothetical desert island with one CD, one meal, and one book:  “The CD would be Jason Isbell.  The food would be chicken salad, and I’d have to have my Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book.  It keeps me alive.”

The food she could eat every day:  “Peanut butter. I seek and find all kinds. My fave so far has been PB Crave Razzle Dazzle. It has white chocolate and chocolate chips with a swirl of raspberry. I have been known to eat it straight out of the jar.”

The food she never hopes to eat again:  “Meatloaf.”  

Her favorite guilty pleasure:  “Gigi’s Cupcakes. I can eat one in two minutes flat, but I have to be alone. It’s pretty embarrassing. Icing everywhere.”