Keep the conversation open surrounding suicide

On Monday, Glenn Magargee awoke at 6 a.m. to a phone call. On the other end of the line, a mother hectically described the situation — her child, a 10 year old, had cut her wrists.

Magargee traced a line across her own arm with her finger.

It was the first of many stories she would tell that morning. She described how self-inflicted wounds are becoming a trend among teens, both boys and girls, desperately seeking to feel something. She talked of others she knew — teenagers — who complete suicide by hanging or gunshot, some in situations so gut-wrenching they were difficult to hear.

“In this country, a teen takes his or her own life every 13 minutes,” she said as she finished, leaning up in her chair to rest her elbows on her knees. “It’s something we need to be talking about.”

The subject comes up now as students, parents and staff in the Pell City High School family are suffering loss. On Friday, August 28, Pell City Police Chief Greg Turley and St. Clair County Coroner Dennis Russell confirmed that a 16-year-old PCHS student died that morning. Authorities said the student’s death is under investigation.

That day, the school opened its resource floodgates to the Panther family, inviting in local ministers to meet with students and directing others to trusted counselors and teachers.

“Kids are going to discuss what’s important to them,” Pell City Schools Superintendent Dr. Michael Barber said. “It only makes sense. This is a hard subject, but we want to support them in any kind of crisis.”

Magargee is part of that support network. Besides her work as a licensed counselor in Pell City, she also runs the Mustard Seed Society, a local organization that provides horse and adventure-based therapy for children and teens. One area of the nonprofit’s mission is its annual Suicide Prevention Program, which will travel to all seven high schools in St. Clair County this school year.

The program will first be held on Sept. 11 and 18 for PCHS freshmen. Magargee said she addresses ninth-grade students because teens at that age are especially susceptible to new pressures — academic, social and otherwise. Not only will they face the weight of an increasing workload, but they’ll also delve deeper into romantic relationships and some will face bullying for the first time.

“I think we stress so much now, but our children don’t have the coping mechanisms necessary to deal with it,” Magargee said.

With all the pressure, depression and anxiety can become consuming. In children and young adults, these feelings can lead to self-destructive behavior.

“I like to use the analogy that it’s like a cup of water,” said Erin Jones, Crisis and Suicide Line Program Coordinator with the Crisis Center in Birmingham. “Each drop is something. First it can be bullying, then isolation, then depression. A person becomes suicidal when the water starts spilling out of the cup.

“It’s never just one thing.”

Magargee and Jones said what anyone needs when their cup begins to fill is a safe outlet. Both said the topic of suicide has a stigma in modern society, and those who wrestle the feelings do so in silence for fear of upsetting social balances.

In young people, those who struggle with mental illnesses like depression and anxiety — those most at risk of suicidal behaviors — are often more difficult to identify due to normal teen behavior patterns. All adolescents have ups and downs, and it’s often credited to puberty, Jones said. But the statistics are staggering.

Data from the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention shows suicide is the third leading cause of death in Alabama for ages 10-14. On average, a person dies by suicide every 12 hours in the state, and about twice as many die by suicide per year than by homicide.

“We have to be as comfortable talking about suicide as any other disease,” Jones said. “Still, many in this area don’t want to. Because of that, people continue to suffer in silence. They don’t feel like they have the courage to reach out. They feel alone.”

What’s important then is to open the door for conversation, and to make clear that resources are abundant, especially in the area. In the Pell City School System, faculty have access to 20 organizations that offer support in the areas of counseling, mental illness and substance abuse, Superintendent Barber said.

But most often, what people no matter the age find, he said, is that someone close to them will provide the best ear.

“Anytime a child is going through a crisis in life, just reach out,” Barber advised. “With school personnel, you would be surprised who a student will connect with. Sometimes they’ll be the last person on the bus, and they’ll sit with the driver and just talk and talk.”

Magargee said too that parents and friends aren’t always the best place to find help. Sometimes a student needs a trusted source they feel connected to but who isn’t a primary figure in their lives. In these cases particularly, she said, it’s vital that loved ones be supportive.

Overall, the best things to do are look for signs, listen and keep the topic open.

“Any you time lose a child, you lose a part of your future,” Barber said. “There’s just nothing more tragic than that.”

Glen Magargee

Mustard Seed Society: (205) 913-0628

mustardseedkids.org

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Erin Jones, Crisis Center Birmingham

Local: (205) 323-7777,

National: (800) 273-TALK

SOS (Survivors of Suicide): Serving St. Clair County. Meets on the first and third Thursday of each month from 7-8:30 p.m. at the Crisis Center in Birmingham, 3600 8th Ave. S., Suite 500.

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From Pell City Schools

East Alabama Mental Health: (800) 815-0630

Family Guidance Center: (205) 945-6000

Hopeline: (800) SUICIDE

Suicide Hotline: (205) 332-0352